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Personality and Relationships

Have you ever noticed how opposites attract in relationships, but seem to have a difficult time sustaining?  I find in my practice that the traits that draw couples together in the beginning of the relationship are the same ones that tear them apart.  Why is that?  It seems that initially in our relationships we seek a complimentary partner and someone who will balance us out.  After the initial excitement phase we don’t nurture or appreciate those differences, but instead rigidly focus on our way of doing things.  We need to be reminded of the personality traits that originally attracted us to our partner and respect the differences that existed from the onset of the relationship.  We also will benefit from incorporating some of these differences into our own repertoire of relating to others.  Differences in personality do not have to be a deal breaker in a relationship, in fact, those differences can be an asset to your relationship.  It requires us to be open to other ways of doing things and appreciate that we continue to learn from others until we die.  Remind yourself that different is not necessarily good or bad, it’s just different.  Accept differences in others, especially those you love, and the differences will become an asset rather than a liability.

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