We all have good and bad aspects to our personality. Unfortunately many of us focus on the negative and minimize the positive. We tend to be our own worst enemies and beat up on ourselves for mistakes, flaws, and miscues, instead of reminding ourselves of our value. Many of our personality traits are like double-edged swords; they are both beneficial and detrimental. Even narcissistic traits can have some value since a healthy level of narcissism can help shake off failures, create self-confidence, and instill drive/perseverance. Of course, the downsides of that trait are a lack of empathy and a sense of entitlement. Can you think of some of your own traits that can have both a good and bad aspect to them?
We can become more aware of our personality traits that need to change from others’ feedback and through self-analysis. Sometimes a sermon, blog, book, or TV/radio program can point out a characteristic that you can identify with and recognize you need to change. On our journey through life we can constantly learn and grow through our experiences when we decide to use those experiences. In fact, the key to success is not giving up when you fail. Another factor is forgiveness since letting go of our past mistakes enables us to focus on our accomplishments. So instead of focusing on the one thing that is negative (“perfect is the enemy of good”), pay attention to the many positive things that you have done. Life is not a sprint but rather a marathon, so relax. You’ll get another chance to excel.
Sometimes it helps to make a list of 8-10 of your positive traits, write them on index cards, and every morning read the list to remind yourself of your positive attributes. Once you’ve memorized the list, practice repeating that list in your head, using positive self-talk, and trusting that positive thinking leads to positive actions and outcomes. For many of us identifying the positive in ourselves and others is very difficult, but over time it gets easier and more natural. Make a commitment to find three positive things in yourself or someone else each day. Remember we are what we think which translates into what we do. Make positivity a greater priority in your life and reap the rewards.
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