Does your laser beam focus on success prevent you from seeing other aspects of life? Do you find yourself thinking about work 24/7? You’re not alone. Many of my clients have spent their entire lives striving for success only to find that there is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. And there were multiple casualties along the way while they were attempting to achieve the ultimate success through financial wealth and security. We can get so caught up in the success engine that we lose our peripheral vision and neglect or ignore the important people in our lives. We assume that others can function without our attention, time, and connection while we are consumed with our journey to success. We even attempt to justify and rationalize our behavior by convincing ourselves and others that we’re working hard to create something special for them, but at what cost?
Many of my clients have made their careers and material success a much higher priority than their relationships with family and friends. They may feel greater comfort with skills in the workplace along with a greater sense of power and control. On the contrary, relationships require more emotional awareness, sensitivity and emotional intelligence. The therapy process typically includes awareness raising, modifying thoughts, expressing feelings, and ultimately changing behaviors. When a person applies the same determination and commitment that has enabled them to be successful in their profession to improving their relationships transformation happens.
Ultimately the hope is that individuals redefine success and broaden their parameters. Creating a lavish and affluent lifestyle with no one to share in it doesn’t sound very appealing to most. Over the years of my work I’ve seen thousands throw away or destroy their relationships and put achievement over connection. Modifying our priorities and being intentional about our connections to our spouse, children, family, and friends can enrich our lives and create greater happiness than our material possessions. How much time do you carve out during the week to listen, share, and connect through activities and words with people you love? Make a commitment today to value the people you care about and show it through your words and actions. We need to show the desire and commitment to connect less with technology and more with people. Relationships can last a lifetime while objects lose their value overnight.